J is for Jerks

Why Writing is Like a Relationship

a-z blog

Nay-sayers abound in this world. They love to tell you how this won’t work or how you’re doing that wrong. They enjoy telling you, in detail, about your flaws. They do it for everything.


When I first started dating my husband, several of our mutual friends had a bet running about how long we’d last before we broke up.

Sometimes our friends try to warn us out of kindness. “Look Bob, I know you like Christine, but she has a history of using guys to pay her bills because she doesn’t want to get a job. I know this because she’s my sister.”

A valid warning. These people are not usually jerks. These people will listen when you talk of publication and ask what your plan is. They may even offer ideas to consider.

But the majority of I’m telling you this for your own good advice comes in a different form. “You’re just not his type, Mary.” This is usually said quite smugly.

Along with this gem: “You want to be a published author? That’s stupid and a waste of your time. You’re not good enough.”

Total jerk. I got that one from an unnamed family member.

Jerks try to sabotage who you are and what you want. Jerks often times don’t even realize they are jerks. They think they’re saving you from something far worse with their “straight talk.” They hurt you, but they puff themselves up with an important feeling of having done their duty of making you see the light. Jerks can be friends, family or even a guy you met 37 seconds ago in the buffet line at your friend’s surprise 40th birthday party.

The problem is that jerks don’t tend to believe in dreams.

It’s hard to make a dream into something that will work when you’re surrounded by jerks.

Sometimes you just have to ignore the jerks. And that can be really hard.

Check out what other folks chose to blog about today. A to Z Blogging Challenge.


About kattywampusbooks

A SAHM with delusions of literacy.
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